I have no rights

Defensive driving is all about safety. At least... that's what my manual told me. On thing I remember from the manual about safe driving had to do with 'right of way'. It explained that I never have the right of way... but sometimes other people do. The basic principle is that, while driving, it's always better and safer to yield to the other person, regardless of whether I think I have the right of way.

In church today, Mr. Hartung taught on Genesis 13. In this passage, Abram and his nephew Lot were having a bit of a conflict... there wasn't enough land to go around. The flocks of Abram and Lot were draining the resources and it was causing fights among their herdsmen.

Now... there were a couple of things Abram COULD have done in this situation. Mr. Hartung explained that Abram had more rights than Lot. He was the elder, and they were technically on his land. God Almighty Himself had given this land to Abram. Abram was richer, more powerful, and deserved more respect.

According to human thinking, Abram had the 'right of way'.

But Abram was a peacemaker. He laid aside his right and went to his nephew humbly. Here is what he said:

Genesis 13:8-9

So Abram said to Lot, “Let’s not have any quarreling between you and me, or between your herders and mine, for we are close relatives. Is not the whole land before you? Let’s part company. If you go to the left, I’ll go to the right; if you go to the right, I’ll go to the left."

Abram sought peace with his nephew at his own expense. Lot, true to human form, picked the nicest plot of land (I may to a post about his poor choice later, but let's keep on point for now), but Abram didn't argue. He laid aside what were his rights, sought peace, and acted in true humility. His willingness to humble himself before his lesser spared the family a feud, and God blessed him for it, giving him a plot of land as far as his eyes could see that would be passed down to the rest of his offspring.

So, as I was listening to the sermon, I was challenged.
I'm used to holding onto my rights fiercely. But, Jesus didn't say "blessed are those who stand up for themselves". Jesus said "blessed are the peacemakers."

Now, Mr. Hartung pointed out, peace sounds really nice. But it's really hard. I've been struggling lately with trying to avoid conflict in some of my relationships, and it's proved difficult. I thought I was doing my best to be a peacemaker. But Mr. Hartung said something that really struck me, and made me realize what I was doing wrong. This is what he said:

"Peace requires a sacrifice. Making peace always costs the peacemaker."

Maybe that's where I'm going wrong. Sure, I may want peace. I may be willing to be nice to get it. But am I willing to sacrifice? Am I willing to go to someone, even when I may be right, and act in humility and generosity towards that person to solve the conflict? Am I willing to relinquish what I see as my rights? Or am I insisting that I have the right of way?

Another challenging quote from the sermon:

Humility cures conflict. How many of our relational problems would be solved if we were a notch humbler?

Oy vay... do I ever have things to work on.
So some personal application for myself, and perhaps for you--

I think it's time for me to try some humility in my friendships. And as I'm trying to figure out how to avoid or solve conflicts with others, I have a new question to ask myself.

What rights am I holding onto that are causing conflicts, and how can I let go of them?

I have no rights. Everything I have is a gift of Jesus, through His sacrifice. Jesus was willing to give up everything that was rightfully His to make peace between God and man. This peace cost the peacemaker so much. How can I not be willing to give up rights I don't even deserve, to preserve peace among my brothers and sisters in Christ?

Jesus sacrificed so much to give us peace. I can't imagine how it must hurt Him to see me causing strife because I'm trying to hold onto rights I don't deserve. So, that's it. No more rights for me. I have created a personal bill of rights for myself and it has gotten in the way of my ability to serve others. Well, it's going out the window. I resolve to sacrifice to make peace. I resolve to be generous and humble with those I am in conflict with. I resolve to yield to others, even when I think I have the right of way.

I have no rights.