little graces (that turn out to be big graces)

Sorry. You get another post on how beautiful life is. Why? Because it's true, and yet so easy to forget. And because writing these things down helps me to remember also.

My friend asked me how I was doing today, and for the first time, I was actually able to articulate what God has been slowly teaching me and working in my heart.

Our attitude towards life should and can be quietly content. Not because life is not hard... because it is hard. Really hard. But in the midst of some really, really hard things going on, God has been gracious enough to send me little reminders of His grace about every 5 minutes.

In the midst of heartbreak, confusion, loneliness, unfortunate circumstances, strife and the occasional panic attack, God drops little blessings in my lap to remind me that He is there, He is powerful, and He loves me. Whether it's a friend who randomly stops to say that that they've been thinking of me, a shooting star flaming across the sky, a rainstorm to wipe away the humidity, a butterfly, mist on the grass, swing dancing, or a song on the piano, God fills this life with small, shining moments of pure love for us. These are all little things... but these small graces turn out to be big graces because they remind me, again, that God is, and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him. And that knowledge changes everything.

I don't believe in coincidences... especially highly improbably ones. I think it is God's grace that, during a time in my life where I could be severely tempted to complain or worse, despair, He puts me in a play where I spend hours rehearsing and committing to memory reminders of what makes life beautiful and challenges to not overlook those things.

Life is hard. Life is confusing. Life is disorienting. Life is painful. But our good God has also made life beautiful.

and all shall be well

The wind whispered softly through the leaves around the lake. The sun shone down through the crisp air, dancing through the grass. The girl sat contentedly, back against brick wall, face toward the water, book in lap. It was a perfect afternoon.

She sat there quietly happy for a time. Suddenly, her ears pricked up to noise. A siren in the distance built slowly to a crescendo until it was right on her back doorstep. She froze, heart pumping. Perhaps it was paranoia, but every time she heard a siren coming in their direction, she wondered…

It passed. She breathed again. The sun shone as before. The wind still laughed.

She sat back and thought.

A siren seemed out of place on this idyllic day. Sirens ought to be on rainy days, stormy days, or at least cloudy days. Days like today ought to be reserved for dancing and laughing and reading a book under a tree.

Ought to be.

No, this world is not as it ought to be. One person’s perfect day could be the day another person’s world falls apart. The sun shines on both the joyous and the horrific, and the rain falls on the comedic and the tragic. What a confusing, upside down, crazy world she lived in.

She lifted her eyes to the clear, infinitely deep blue sky. A bird sang. Her heart warmed to the day.

One day, she thought, all shall again be well. All shall be well.